Creating

• “Opinion: Colorado’s Outdoor Equity Grant Program has done immeasurable good but needs more funding to meet community needs,” The Colorado Sun, January 19, 2024. An opinion piece advocating for increasing the funding for the Outdoor Equity Grant Program to at least $10 million to begin to meet community needs.
• “Ways whiteness show sup in CCF to the detriment of everyone (including white folks), part 3: Retribution for speaking out in support of Palestine,” Community-Centric Fundraising, December 18, 2023. An essay about how the worst way that whiteness shows up in the nonprofit sector, from my purview, is and always has been white folks retaliating against People of the Global Majority speaking truth to power. Most recently, it’s shown up as retribution for speaking out in support of Palestine.
• “Ways whiteness shows up in CCF to the detriment of everyone (including white folks), part 2: “Stop using that word.’” Community-Centric Fundraising, December 11, 2023. An essay showing how whiteness shows up in the Community-Centric Fundraising movement in the form of demanding BIPOC voices be silenced or edited for white comfort, how it harms white people, and how we can stop and heal from the impacts.
• “Ways whiteness shows up in CCF to the detriment of everyone (including white folks), part 1: ‘Do something about her.’” Community-Centric Fundraising, November 27, 2023. An essay showing how whiteness shows up in the Community-Centric Fundraising movement in the form of white people asking for “policing” in a space that intentionally doesn’t have any, how it impacts white people, and how we can choose to stop and heal from the damage done.
• “What you can do this Pride month: stop your organization from rainbowfying its logo unless it spends the rest of the year materially making things better for LGBTIQA2+ folks,” Community-Centric Fundraising, June 5, 2023. An essay about rainbow-washing, how it harms, and what organizations can do instead to authentically show up for LGBTIQA2+ folks.
• “Why must the white cis nonprofit workers angry react to all my posts? Ep: Do your own internal labor and healing,” Community-Centric Fundraising, February 6, 2023. An educomic about how a lot of times a lot of times white and cisgender people in white- and cis-led organizations are not required to do their own internal labor or healing, which causes their marginalized colleagues to work double or triple time to emotionally regulate and teach and discusses how white and cis people can do better (and encourages these organizations to expect cultural competency or a desire to learn better and do better in their employees).
• “Why must the white cis nonprofit workers angry react to all my posts? Ep: Always challenge transphobia,” Community-Centric Fundraising, November 23, 2022. An educomic in reaction to the Club Q mass shooting and how we need our allies and accomplices to always challenge transphobia when it shows up at their workplaces and personal lives.
• “Why must the white cis nonprofit workers angry react to all my posts? Ep: White women, stop gatekeeping progress,” Community-Centric Fundraising, November 14, 2022. An educomic about how white women in nonprofits often police and gatekeep JEDI progress and how they can do better.
• “The morning of your gender-affirming top surgery,” en*gendered lit mag, October 12, 2022. A creative nonfiction piece about the lack of anxiety and fear present on the day of my gender-affirming top surgery that made me realize it was the right move for me.
• “In a season of rampant anti-Indigeneity, here are some things you should do and shouldn’t do to be pro-Indigenous,” Community-Centric Fundraising, October 10, 2022. Essay about how the days including and between Indigenous Peoples’ Day and Native American Heritage Day are full of micro- and macro-aggressions from white-led environmental nonprofits, white people in environmental nonprofits, and sometimes even from my kinfolk who aren’t transparent when trying to get white peopels’ money to continue their good works in their nonprofits. Included are things that people can do (or not do) to mitigate some of that harm.
• “Why must the white cis nonprofit workers angry react to all my posts? Ep: ‘That’s just the way it is!’” Community-Centric Fundraising, August 8, 2022. An educomic about two ties white cis nonprofit folks got big mad when I brought up an equity issue when they didn’t want to hear them and how others can do better.
• “The Anniversary,” Rulerless: An Anarchist Anthology, pgs. 110-114, May 1, 2022. A short story based in my dehumanizing experiences at a Mercedez-Benz call center and in navigating “professional” spaces with majority white, cisgender, heterosexual, allosexual individuals as a queer, trans, mixed-race person.
• “Why does equitable need-based pay make white folks so scared?” Community-Centric Fundraising, March 10, 2022. Essay about how people with relative privilege often choose to uphold a status quo they know is inequitable because they’re afraid of how solutions might be implemented and because the status quo often does not harm them. I challenge those folks to envision better and make changes anyway.
• “Underpaid staff don’t need motivation, they need dollar bills and benefits,” Community-Centric Fundraising, January 10, 2022. Essay about how underpaying nonprofit workers is not an immutable fact of nonprofit work, but a series of choices made by (mostly rich, white) nonprofit leaders since the nonprofit sector was first thought into existence in 1867. And a list of “solutions” that are not replacements for small paychecks and some that may be (if your staff agrees to them).
• “Seeing Mémé,” All My Relations, Volume 1, pgs. 50-51, August 15, 2021. A comic about searching for my grandmother in my own features after her passing.
• “What is my style without limitiations?” Just Femme and Dandy, June 12, 2021. A comic exploring my hopes and possibilities of what I could wear after gender affirming top surgery.
• “Three times trying a community-centric approach paid off,” Community-Centric Fundraising, May 4, 2021. Essay covering how “that’s how fundraising is” should not be the answer to “that’s not an equitable practice.” And three times I tried a community-centric approach and it paid off, including the time I organized a week-long, virtual education event and gave it away for free; the time I divested from AmazonSmile and immediately received donations equalling six years worth of disbursements; and the time I changed our sponsorship levels from dollar levels to a percentage of income.
• “Every world is my world (I will learn to survive,” Ghost Heart Literary Journal, March 7, 2021. A creative non-fiction piece about the summer of 1993 I spent trying to capture the perfect copy of “Ordinary World” from the radio and reading all the Richard Peck, LJ Smith, and Christopher Pike books available at the Brown County Library – East Branch Young Adult section, in an effort to find a secret pathway into a different world where I’d be accepted and celebrated. CW: mention of arson and mention of an ableist word “crazy” in the context of song lyrics.
• “It Doesn’t Get Better, But We Do,” Stellium Literary Magazine, February 5, 2021. A reaction to reading the It Gets Better book, which doesn’t cover the myriad of experiences where it doesn’t immediately “get better” when high school ends – the time when a lot of white, cisgender people immediately gain agency or leave their oppressive environments for college or “a new start” – something not always afforded or affordable to others in the community. But we get better.
• “What Color Am I,” Elevator Stories, January 30, 2021. A creative non-fiction piece illustrating how mixed-raced kids experience growing up mixed-race, feeling not enough of any one thing to belong. And how often, it takes us until our adulthood to process it all if we aren’t raised with a kinship network of people like us. CW: racism.
• “Always Give a Cost of Living Increase – Yes, Especially After 2020,” Community-Centric Fundraising, January 12, 2021. Essay on why employers should always give a cost-of-living increase. Not all employees have the same ability to weather financial hits as they come, and a lot of that will have to do with our histories, which, of course, has a lot to do with our intersections. Passion exploitation can damage marginalized staffs’ long-term financial security.
• “If one wants to survive a hostile world, one must adapt,” Mixed Mag, November 25, 2020. A creative non-fiction piece that names some of the survival adaptations in nature and in BIPOC individuals. CW: mentions of Indigenous trauma.
• “Making Three Separate Piles,” Ayaskala, November 6, 2020. A creative non-fiction piece about how I’ve trained my brain to automate a process of storing memories that emphasizes the bad, enjoy and forget the good, and not notice the neutral moments. CW: mentions of anxiety, a white supremacist, and anti-trans rhetoric.
• “Disparate List Items for the Child Who May Come Next,” dreams walking, September 23, 2020. A creative non-fiction piece about how an incident (or series of incidents) can trigger a trauma response tied to something deeper. CW: mentions of racism, physical abuse, and sexual abuse. Page 25.
• “I’ve always been like a freight train,” Ghost Heart Lit, September 4, 2020. A creative non-fiction piece about the journey to connect with my Indigeneity and find my people. CW: discussion around Indigenous trauma.
• “When Time Stopped at Gunther Toody’s,” Cat on a Leash Review, July 3, 2019. Winner of the Editor’s Choice Prize. This SciFi short story is a response to the phenomena that all people in marginalized communities experience – namely that no one else seems to notice when things go horribly wrong. CW: racism, homophobia, transphobia.

Issue Topic 13: Tips for Practicing Using Affirming Pronouns

In one of my nonprofit Facebook groups, someone asked for advice on switching their habits and using someone’s affirming pronouns. First of all, I love that question and that it was asked in this space where normally cisgender people argue against “having to” use affirming pronouns. It’s also a great question that I’ll answer here.

Issue Topic 12: How to Affirm People with Multiple Pronouns

When nonbinary people (and others) use multiple pronouns, they often don’t get fully affirmed. Cisgender people usually end up defaulting to (especially) binary ones. This educomic will illustrate the more affirming way to acknowledge people with multiple pronouns.

Issue Topic 11: How to Use Pronouns in an Affirming Way

Too often, when nonbinary people tell others their pronouns, people do one of two things: they change the way they converse to avoid using pronouns altogether or they use the affirming pronouns in a way that is awkward or othering. This educomic will illustrate how to use pronouns in an affirming way.

Issue Topic 10: Being Transgender is NOT Like Being “Transracial”

In a nonprofit Facebook group for people of color, a question popped up without context and it made me feel sick to my stomach. It read “Any good resources on why being transgendered [sic] is not like someone claiming to be ‘transracial’?” This isn’t the first time I’ve seen this argument used to delegitimize my identity, but it was the first time in a space for people of color for me. I’m going to attempt to illustrate the difference here in the hopes I won’t see that question again.

Issue Topic 9: Refusing to Affirm Pronouns is Like…

Too often, when nonbinary people affirm their identities, pronouns, or names, people react in ways that value their own comfort over our dignity. Pronouns are as important to affirm as our names, because they say who we are. To illustrate how silly (at best) and hostile (at worst) every argument made to justify using the wrong pronoun is, let’s reimagine the scenario using names.

Issue Topic 8: The Harm of the Deadname Guessing Game

When you ask a nonbinary or trans person what their “real” name is, you are telling them that you don’t think their affirming name is legitimate. This can feel like you don’t think they are legitimate. Here are three times recently where I was exposed to this behavior and what it felt like was happening.

Issue Topic 7: Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria is a FART Myth

This little comic is going to attempt to show why the rhetoric of Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria is harmful and to explain to parents and therapists why it’s an anti-trans propaganda myth and isn’t a thing to worry about in their trans or nonbinary kids.

Issue Topic 6: Let Nonbinary People Tell Their Own Stories

This little comic is going to attempt to show why speaking for and telling nonbinary peoples’ stories is harmful. In the hopes that next time, people will allow nonbinary people to tell their own stories and will choose to amplify that message instead.

Issue Topic 5: Celebrate the Affirming Wins When They Happen

This little comic will discuss some of the wins we largely ignore and why we should be celebrating each and every one. Being nonbinary is a struggle some days, but some days we have things we could be celebrating, and we should! Also, if you aren’t nonbinary, gender nonconforming, or trans, you can still use this comic. Remind your friends who are to celebrate the wins and maybe even offer to help them do it!

Issue Topic 4: Have Patience More Than You Demand Patience

This little comic is going to attempt to help people see what it’s like to suffer constant misgendering and then constantly be told to have patience with others without receiving any patience in return. In the hopes it will inspire people to check on their nonbinary friends and family without this added harm.

Issue Topic 3: Why to Believe and Not Gatekeep Identity

This little comic is going to attempt to help those people visualize what it’s like to constantly be asked to qualify your identity to strangers, friends, and family. In the hopes it will inspire people to accept identity without doubt or this added harm.

Issue Topic 2: Why to Defer to Nonbinary People on Their Experiences

This little comic is going to attempt to help people visualize why it’s vitally important to trust the experiences of nonbinary people and why it is necessary to center on the lived experience of nonbinary people (not the opinion of someone who thought about it for a sec).

Issue Topic 1: Why to Use Affirming Pronouns

This little comic is going to attempt to help people visualize what it’s like to navigate a world that continually misgenders you.

Episode 2: White women, stop gatekeeping progress

An educomic about how white women in nonprofits often police and gatekeep JEDI progress and how they can do better.

View accessible/text-only version

Episode 1: “That’s Just the Way It Is”

Two times white cis nonprofit folks got big mad when I brought up an equity issue when they didn’t want to hear about them and how they can do better.

View accessible/text-only version

Issue 3: Cede power, take feedback, and pay experts for their expertise

A lot of the time, once white folks (or others with relative privilege) learn about an injustice, they immediately want to jump from awareness to action. This is commendable, but they haven’t done the necessary work to live better first or to fully understand the nuance of the problem, so their “fixes” cause new problems. This educomic will hopefully explain why it’s important to cede power, take feedback, and pay experts for their expertise.

Issue 2: Harming more than you help by centering the wrong things

During the summer of 2020, I found out something harmful happened. The organization responsible put out a harmful non-apology and doubled-down on harm all the way through the process of trying to find out how it happened, culminating in a blow-out that further harmed all parties affected. This comic will explain what happened and how it could have been handled much better.

Issue 1: Performative Apologies & Valuing Identities For What They Provide You

Someone I had provided a free education to issued a performative public apology and talked about what value I provided to her life simply by living my authentic life. She meant this to be a positive post, but it was micro-aggressive itself. This comic will explain why and talk about what she could have done instead to be a better ally – or ever better – an accomplice.

In Chapter 1, Charlie explores the idea of finding an affirming therapist to help them sort through their anxiety. All the other characters (Yang, Shondra, Tar, Isaac, Max, Alex, and Dion) reflect on how they initially started therapy with their trans-affirming therapist, Kim.

In Chapter 2, we view Yang after 63 days in therapy. Did they come out as nonbinary to their family and if so, how did it go?

In Chapter 3, we see Shondra after 121 days in therapy. Did ze rage quit hir job due to white cishet nonsense, or is therapy with Kim helping?

In Chapter 4, we see Tar after 212 days in therapy. They follow politics very closely. How did they feel about the 2018 elections?

The Story of Them has been on an extended hiatus, but more chapters are coming.

This publication makes every attempt to present things that happened from an own voices perspective, but stories may have gotten filtered through the lens of the author.

Additionally, while these are real stories that contain the bad and the good things that happened to real nonbinary individuals, they may not be a blueprint for how to affirm every nonbinary individual. Always defer to behaviors that people tell you affirms them.

Here’s an interview with Sable Schultz, Manager of Transgender Services at The Center for Colfax on the project:

Here are some pages from the project:

The Story of Them Intro to Group

Why Go to Therapy

Remembering the First Therapy Session

Being Asked Pronouns

To purchase the professionally printed chapters, visit our Ko-fi store. You can also become a monthly supporter!

When Chris had their hysterectomy, they promised their surgeon, Dr. Joshua Sampson a Flat Stanley-esque photo shoot with Crampus, who they were allowed to keep. Since it took them two years to follow through on that promise, they decided to make the shoot epic – creating scenarios, clothes, and more for Crampus to model with. What resulted was a feel good zine they sent to Dr. Sampson as a thank you.

Here are the photographs from that project.